“You need to watch …”
This sentence has been a constant my entire life with interchangeable titles. The Sopranos. Deadwood. Seinfeld (I’m old). Breaking Bad. Game of Thrones. Year after year, decade after decade, someone has attempted to guilt me for what I have been missing in my leisure time.
Upon hearing this admonition, I have always smiled and acted politely as my insides filled with dread, annoyance and disappointment at the messenger for wasting my time. (People and their stupid shows, amiright?)
That said, you need to watch Love on the Spectrum.
Unlike the iconic leads in the above mentioned shows, the main characters on LOTS haven’t been brought to life through the alchemy between writer and actor.
The leads on LOTS are everyday human beings who are living brilliantly and beautifully with autism. They’re brought to life by the magical alchemy of unconditional love and family. None of the cast are playing a character. They are the character. The only character they know how to be. In this TikTok, quick fix world, Netflix finds themselves filming people who have waited their entire lives to simply be embraced as themselves. The result is nothing short of glorious.
The conceit of the show is simple and, at first review, a bit cruel. Take a few people on the autism spectrum and film them going on a date. Almost always their first date. Ever.
Admittedly, I was so uncomfortable watching these first dates. The conversations are halting and awkward. There’s a great deal of silence. There’s social anxiety. Things are said that are inappropriate. There are panic attacks. It’s honestly tough to watch.
But then there’s … something. That thing that lives dormant in most of us a nostalgic memory. That thing is a connection. An impossible, long shot, snow in July-type connection. Then, for the viewer, there’s an almost selfish feeling of relief.
We’re not comfortable with too much silence. When we have social anxiety we tend to flee. When the LOTS cast find that divine spark, that connection, they are unknowingly and mercifully letting us all off the hook from the hang ups we brought in the door with us. Watching people on the spectrum find their soul mate is like watching flowers grow through concrete.
It can take a while. For our cast it’s taken a lifetime.
While watching Love on the Spectrum, I realized I was feeling something that I have never felt before watching television. Victory. Sobbing while I cried tears of gratitude. Victory. No one but my new heroes could ever have walked me to that destination. And I am deeply humbled to have had the honor of watching them.
You need to watch Love on the Spectrum.
Jay Mohr is a writer, actor, stand-up comedian and host of the podcast series Mohr Stories. A recent episode, which can be seen here, found Mohr sitting down with Love on the Spectrum star Connor Tomlinson.