Jon Stewart and CNN panelists reacted to a very dramatic debate between Joe Biden and Donald Trump on Thursday night.
Stewart roasted the performances of both candidates, and seemed massively frustrated with the electoral choice America has apparently been presented with. Stewart seemed particularly concerned by Biden’s performance, with the president seeming pale, fragile and shaky on stage during CNN’s 90-minute debate.
“The one thing that we did prove tonight is that MAGA conspiracy theory about Biden’s upcoming debate performance was nonsense,” Stewart said, and rolled clips of conservatives claiming Biden would use performance-enhancing drugs to be charged-up during the debate. “Let me just say after watching tonight’s debate, both of these men should be using performance enhancing drugs. As much of it as they can get, as many times a day, as their bodies will allow. Performance enhancing drugs that will improve their lucidity, their ability to solve problems, and in one of the candidate’s case, improve their truthfulness, morality, and malignant narcissism. Whatever magical drugs that can kick their brains into gear, because this ain’t Olympic swimming. Oh, he solves the Middle East, but he was doping, so it doesn’t count? And if those drugs don’t exist, if there aren’t actual performance enhancing drugs for these candidates, I could sure fucking use some recreational ones right now. Because this cannot be real life! It just can’t! Fuck! We’re America!”
But perhaps the most impactful moment wasn’t anything Stewart said. The host played a clip of Biden seemingly blanking out about 10 minutes into the debate, and Stewart’s audience went quiet and gave some pained moans.
“Call the real estate agent in New Zealand,” Stewart quipped. “Sure, it’s not something that repeated throughout the debate causing Democrats across the country to either jump out of windows or vomit silently into the nearest recycling bin. Anybody can fuck up … talking. A lot of people have resting 25th Amendment face.”
Stewart also ripped Trump for saying a great many things that were blatantly false. “Everything that Donald Trump said in that clip is a lie,” Stewart said at one point. “Blatant and full. And we were tight on time putting this thing together. There’s plenty more.”
CNN’s panel after the debate was blistering about Biden’s performance, with CNN anchor John King noting, “This was a game-changing debate. Right now, as we speak, there is a deep, a wide, and a very aggressive panic in the Democratic Party. It involves party strategists, involves elected officials. It involves fundraisers, and they’re having conversations about the President’s performance, which they think was dismal which they think will hurt other people down the party in the ticket and they’re having conversations about what they should do about it.”
A very grave Van Jones added: “I love Joe Biden. I worked for Joe Biden. He didn’t do well. It looked like the old man versus the con man … I just want to speak from my heart. I love that guy. He’s a good man. He loves this country. He’s doing the best he can. But he had a chance to restore confidence of the country and of the base and he failed to do that. And I think there’s a lot of people who are going to want to see him consider taking a different course now. We’re still far from our convention. And there is time for this party to figure out a different way for people to do that.”
Former White House communications director Alyssa Farah Griffin said: “I believe Biden lost in the first three minutes. I think a lot of voters probably tuned out and millions of people are having conversations with their families and with their friends if the President is up to the task, and if he should step aside. I’m someone who believes the former president is a threat to democracy. I think he is a threat to the America and we know he wants to fundamentally change our institutions. He has laid out what his plan is. I am not confident that [Biden is] the man to take him on. He cannot tell me democracy is on the line and then give that performance. That was painful.”
The Daily Show aired live on Thursday night for Indecision 2024: The First Presidential Debate: America Watches Through Its Fingers — a title which proved all too accurate.
